Three Men and a Baby
by anneenichole
Summary: What would happen if Sam, Dean and Cas had to raise a baby? And if said baby was supernatural?


They were cruising along in the Impala like any other day when things started to change. Cas blinked into the back seat and leaned forward to squeeze between Sam and Dean.

"Slow down," he said in a casual voice.

"Heavens, Cas! You can't do that while I'm driving," Dean replied, following instructions.

"What's going on?" Sam asked, all business.

"I have instructions for the three of us to stop up here. Something to do with your destiny. And hers," he added as an afterthought.

"Who's?" Dean asked, his voice beginning to fill with anger.

"The girl's."

Dean scoffed, "That helps."

"I don't know much more than you do. Slow down more. It's supposed to be right up here."

Dean didn't respond and the three men turned their attention back to the road. After a minute, a white spot on the road came into view. Dean stopped in the middle of the road-they hadn't seen any cars in hours-and they got out of the car to approach the white spot now looking more and more like a baby buggy. The the of them stopped around it and peered inside to see a sleeping baby wrapped in a pink blanket embroidered with an anti possession symbol.

"What in the hell?" Sam and Dean said in unison.

"There's a letter," Cas said, pointing out the envelope tucked into the buggy. He seemed to be just as baffled as Sam and Dean.

Sam reached down to snatch up the paper after another minute of staring.

"To the Winchesters (And Cas), this is Iliana. She was never meant to be created, but as you can see, she was. They don't understand her, and they're trying to kill her but she's harmless. She's mostly normal. Please, if you've ever wanted to do the right thing, know that this is it. She needs to be watched over and taken care of and I know that the three of you can do that better than anyone else. It's your destiny- and hers. By the time you get this letter, I'll be dead and they'll be looking for her. Take good care of my baby girl. -a fellow hunter" Sam reads aloud

"What in the hell?" Dean said again.

"Someone's coming," Cas said. "I'll hold them off, you guys take the baby and drive."

Dean started to respond but before he could there was a flash of lightning and Cas held up his hands. Dean grabbed the baby from the buggy and ran back to the car, tossing the keys to Sam. Sam quickly turns the car around and speeds away.

"What now?" He asks Dean, glancing to the baby wrapped up in his lap.

"How the hell should I know? I don't know the first thing about babies. Who do you think her parents are?"

"I don't know. It said a hunter but who?"

Dean just shrugs as the baby begins to stir, "Iliana. It's an okay name I guess. What do you think they meant by not normal?"

"No clue. But she'll fit in. If we keep her."

"What else would we do with her?"

"I don't know. So where to?" Sam asked, speeding up. "Bobby's? We're not too far."

"It's as good a place as any I guess."

They were almost there when Cas popped into the backseat again. "I figured you'd head this way. I've been watching for you. Is Iliana still asleep?"

"Thank God, yes."

Cas just nods and settles back into his seat.

"Bobby?" Sam calls out, as they let themselves into the house a few minutes later.

"In here!" Bobby calls from the kitchen. He's seated at the table surrounded by stacks of books and newspapers.

"Uh, hi," Sam says as he Dean and Cas stop in the doorway.

Bobby glances up and scans them over, "What the hell is that?" He asks nodding towards the pink bundle in Dean's arms.

"We were hoping you would know," Sam says and hands him the letter.

Bobby reads quickly and sets it down when he's finished.

"Any idea who the parents are?" Dean asks. "Here take this," he turns to Cas and gives him the baby who's bright green eyes are now open and moving around the room.

"No," Bobby replys simply.

"So what now," Sam asks, but his words are forgotten when a muffled thrumming comes from the baby.

Cas' eyes dart to Sam and Dean. Iliana let's out a whimper and then begins to scream.

"What do we do?" Dean yells over the cries, his eyes wide with fear.

"Get diapers?" Sam suggests, quite unsure himself.

"Do any of you even know how to change a diaper? Because I sure as heck don't."

"I do," Bobby says.

"No offense, Bobby," Sam begins, "But how do you know how?"

"Karen wanted to have a baby but she couldn't," he shrugs, "We watched her sister's kid once."

Dean's eyebrows raise, confusion clear on his face, "I'll get diapers," he takes the keys from Sam and quickly walks back to the door.

"Don't forget wipes!" Bobby calls after him.

Ten minutes later, Dean finds himself standing in the baby section of the department store.

"What the hell am I doing," he says to himself. A young mother a few yards away hears him. She's a pretty blonde with a baby strapped to her back in a carrying thing.

She let's out a small laugh, "Need some help?"

"Uh, yeah that'd be great," Dean replies, coming up with a story. "My, um sister is sick and I have her baby but our, uh, supplies, were lost..."

She laughs again, "How old is the baby?"

"Um, she's a newborn," he says although he has no idea. A newborn should weigh about the same as the Colt when it's loaded, right?

"Well here's the newborn diapers," She grabs a package from the shelf and shoves it into his arms, "and wipes. And here's a bottle. The nipple on this one won't change the shape of her mouth—"

"What?" Dean says, taken aback.

The woman laughs again, "You don't know much about this, do you?" She doesn't wait for a reply, "Just trust me. Here's some formula, but if she has a reaction to this or had colic you'll need this other kind here. Make sure not to make the milk too warm. Pacifiers-these are good for making her stop crying or for her to sleep with. You'll need to clip her nails often since they grow faster on babies. And this is for stuffy noses. You'll need at least this many onsies to get you started. Babies go through clothes faster than men through burgers. Here's soap, and lotion. Do you have a carseat?"

Dean with his arms full of packages uses his chin to keep the things from falling while he responds, "My car has seats..."

She laughs again, "Babies use special seats in the car."

Dean's eyebrows knit together. Twenty minutes later, he stands at the register with a cart packed full of baby equipment. The total is over $200 and he shakes his head as he drives back to Bobby's. Even outside the door he can hear Iliana screaming.

"What took you so long?" Sam shouts when Dean comes in, and full of bags.

"I've got everything we need," Dean says ignoring Sam's question. He'd rather not relay the woman laughing at his lacking knowledge of babies.

Cas passes the baby to Bobby as Dean pulls out a changing pad, diapers, wipes and baby powder.

"C'mere boys. This is your baby, you've gotta learn to take care of her."

Dean, Sam and Cas glance at one another and hesitantly step closer to learn.

"Eughhh," Dean groans, looking away as Bobby unlatches her diaper. "How can something the size of my gun reek worse than a polterghast in a house of rotting bodies?"

When Bobby's finished changing the baby, he hands her to Sam but she's still crying.  
>"Is she hungry?"<p>

"Probably. According to the chick at the store she'll have a bottle like eight times a day or more."

"Eight?"Sam says, his eyebrows raising as he lifts the baby to his shoulder and rubs her back.

"I'll fix the bottle," Bobby says, but after this she's all yours.

"What about giving her a bath?" Dean asks. "We don't know how to do that."

"Well what do I look like? A baby expert?" Bobby rolls his chair to the sink and goes about following the instructions on the can of formula.

Fifteen minutes later, Iliana is fast asleep again in Cas' arms, the empty bottle in Sam's hand.

"This is a lot of work," Sam comments.

"Yeah, How are we supposed to do our job?"

"This _is_ your job," Cas says. "Mine too."

"But we're supposed to go save people from supernatural crap. We're not doing that," Dean argued.

"We are. Only this time it's the supernatural that needs protecting. Can't you see how supernatural she is? " he nods to Iliana.

"Uh no, Cas. And she doesn't look very comfortable like that either," Dean says

"She's grown."

"What the hell are you talking about?"

"When we found her this morning she looked a week old. Now look."

Sam, Dean, and Bobby look over the baby's features. "She looks the same to me," Dean says.

"No," Sam says coming closer and then lifting Iliana into a cradle, "She definitely looks older."

"That's impossible," Dean shakes his head.

"Impossible?" Bobby asks. "How many times have we said something impossible only to find out it's true? If you woke up this morning and I told you you'd be standing here with a baby by the end of the day you'd tell me I was crazy and it was impossible."

Dean shakes his head again, "But this _is_ crazy."

"Well it's still happening," Sam says, walking to a rocking chair across the room.

"Fine," Dean snaps. "Now what?"


End file.
